have we found a donor?

Or should I say, here we go again. We’ve been through several ‘this is the one!’ already. So let me just say: we may possibly, eventually, if all works out, if this is the right thing, potentially, prospectively, hopefully… have found someone.

For the record, here’s how our donor search has gone. I’ll only focus on the ’serious’ candidates, meaning after reviewing the profile, we started calling the agency, etc.:

Donor #1: Lied on her profile. Out.

Donor #2: Chosen by another couple about 2 hours after I received her profile. Decided later I didn’t like her that much anyway. Out.

Donor #3: Also chosen within hours of receiving her profile. Yeah, we could wait, but I was too disgusted by then. Decided later her face is not right. Out.

Donor #4: Very promising, but the lack of professionalism of the agency she was with gave me much pause. A price sheet that’s not even on company letterhead? A web site whose ‘About Us’ page says ‘under construction’? An agency principal who answered his email mistake with an offensive, racially-inappropriate apology [sollie chollie -- who talks like that anymore?]. Out. So very out.

So, with all of that under my wing, I returned to my lengthy list of bookmarked agencies last week and found myself gazing at a donor whose photo I’ve liked for quite some time. Something in it felt right, has always felt right, but I’ve hesitated because of her age. And then I reread her profile and saw that she comes from a very musical family, something I’d overlooked somehow. And then I got excited. And then I called the agency.

And then I waited for 3 days for them to get back to me. To tell me that they were transferring me to another coordinator in the agency. And that I’d hear back soon.

I politely reminded them that I’d waited several days already to know if she was available, and they escalated it a bit.

And then I got an email saying the donor was out of the country, had been for a while and wouldn’t be back for at least a year. In which case:

Donor #5: Out of the country for a year. That’s about as out as you can get.

Suddenly [and I like to think these sudden inspirations are heaven-sent in some way or other, but who really knows...] I remembered Cr@igslist. And I posted a quick, short ad. And I am beginning to think that this is the answer for us.

This time, I posted in the ‘talent’ gig section. And I’ve got 5 people already, one of whom… omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg… looks promising. She’s in our area to boot. Liking that. Enormously. She doesn’t seem motivated by fees so much as a desire to help. Liking that enormously too.

I called the clinic and confessed that I no longer saw the value add of these agencies. She didn’t really answer, but something in the enthusiasm of her tone as she explained how it could be done without the agencies — using our own lawyers and getting directly to the clinic’s screening — told me that agreed with me. (omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg)

Meanwhile, I keep pinching myself saying ‘don’t be a sucker again! don’t get excited too soon!’ But I just had to tell y’all.

Keep your fingers crossed. Prayers, positive thinking and convening with the forces of the universe also welcome.

More soon.

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